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Dec. 4, 2020

071 - Have Less to Have More by Decluttering Your Balagan with Rebekah Saltzman

Free up Money, Time, and Energy by being Intentional about what you own (and what owns you).

When we are not intentional about the things we own, we overspend... which requires us to work more (for something we might not even want).

The extra work requires extra energy (and has other opportunity costs), while other possessions require additional time investments to maintain them.

All this extra investment (or waste) of money, time, and energy can keep us from having time for our most important relationships and our most enjoyable activities.

Learn how you can better enjoy your things and your life by owning less and making sure the things you own are high quality and aligned with your priorities.


Free up Money, Time, and Energy by being Intentional about what you own (and what owns you).

When we are not intentional about the things we own, we overspend... which requires us to work more (for something we might not even want).

The extra work requires extra energy (and has other opportunity costs), while other possessions require additional time investments to maintain them.

All this extra investment (or waste) of money, time, and energy can keep us from having time for our most important relationships and our most enjoyable activities.

Learn how you can better enjoy your things and your life by owning less and making sure the things you own are high quality and aligned with your priorities.

 

ABOUT REBEKAH

Rebekah uses her professional design skills to help her clients create organized and beautiful spaces for themselves and their families.

By helping her clients streamline everything from clothing to papers to books and household goods, they have found that they get the most out of their possessions and stress less about managing it all.

Rebekah holds a degree in fashion design from Parsons School of Design, and for many years worked as a graphic designer. Her passion for the environment and helping people improve their lives drove her to change careers and create Balagan Be Gone.

A native of Silver Spring, Maryland, Rebekah lives with her husband and three children in Israel.

 

HIGHLIGHTS

14:48  Helping Prospects Realize You’re Really Just Trying to Help Them

24:41  How Does Having Less Lead to Freeing Up Your Time & Living Your Purpose

29:29  The Sexiest Things – Cars Without Payments

36:42  Buying Stuff to Fix Our Insecurity

37:10  A System to Get Your Kids Off Their Devices & Create More Family Time

47:35  Creating More Time to Do What We Do Best

5235  How Keeping Expenses Down Allows You to Do More of Your Best / Soul Work

53:58  Multi-Purpose, Awesome Tools (KAJABI)

58:20  “Our Life Will Be So Great When We Get _____________”

1:03:58          Minimalism, Essentialism, and Something Between

1:07:23          How to Know If You Should Probably Buy Something or Not?

1:07:52           What about Black Friday?  

 

 REBEKAH's COMPANY

  • Balagan Be Gone - Clear your clutter, Clear Your Mind
  • GET YOUR CLUTTER CONQUERED AND MAKE YOUR STUFF WORK FOR YOU

 

5-DAY CHALLENGE FROM REBEKAH

 

CONNECT WITH REBEKAH

You can connect with Rebekah on LinkedIn or at rebekah@balaganbegone.com .

 

 

 

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Transcript

Welcome, everybody. Today I have Rebekah Saltzman, and we're going to be talking about how you can have less to have more. So for those of you all who are very linear thinkers, this might mess with your mind a little, which is always fun. I brought Rebecca on because I got to meet her on a virtual summit and really liked her perspective, what she's up to and really thinks she can help you.

 

Rebecca uses her professional design skills to help her clients create organized and beautiful spaces for themselves and their families. By helping her clients streamline everything from clothing to papers to books and household goods, they found they get the most out of their possessions and stress less about managing at all. Rebecca holds a degree in fashion from Parsons School of Design and for many years works as a graphic designer.

 

Her passion for the environment and in helping people improve their lives drove her to change careers and create Balagan Be Gone, a native of Silver Spring, Maryland. Rebecca lives with her husband and three children in Israel.

 

So, first of all, welcome. Thank you for coming out.

 

Thanks for having me.

 

And the most important question on everybody's minds, everybody's mind, what is Balagan and why do we want it to be gone?

 

OK, so Balagan is the Hebrew word for chaos and it's a really popular word in Israel and in Hebrew in general.

 

It's actually not Hebrew in origin, but, you know, whatever. That's a whole other story.

 

And basically, we just want all the chaos and disorder to go out of our lives because who wants it? We don't need it. We don't like it. We don't want it. We want to live our best lives.

 

So that's why I named my company Balagan Be Gone. Awesome.

 

So you share with me a little bit about your journey and moving to Israel. You're originally from the US. How was your journey required you to just get better at living more simply and what's gone on as you've now gone with your family? And what's it been like to adjust to a different type of living? You and I talked about a couple of things. Have you been getting access to certain things? What's it been like for you?

 

So we actually moved from New York City to Israel. That was like a stop in between. Right. And we were five people living in nine hundred square feet. And one day I read this book called Zero Waste Home, and I was like, this lady is a nut.

 

Like, how how could she have, like, no waste and how could you live this simply? And then I'm like, you know, I'm going to try a few things. And I tried a few things and I was like, this is amazing. And I think I couldn't believe how much better my life was when we had less stuff. It cleaning up was faster. And I have three little kids before we moved. My kids are I have twins who are twenty one months younger than my oldest.

 

So it's a little busy in my house. And I mean now they're teenagers already. But, you know, at the time they were like two or three years old and I was like, there's toys everywhere, there's clothes everywhere, there's stuff everywhere.

 

We live in this teeny tiny space. I can't do this anymore. I just couldn't do it.

 

And I was always interested in making space work better. And I'm like, why can't I do this for myself? And and then when I read this book, I was like, yeah, I could do this and I can do this for other people. I'm really good at it. So I started doing it for myself and I'm like, I am living this great life. And then I started doing it for other people and I was like, this is amazing.

 

I am truly doing something that helps people and I love that.

 

I love making a contribution to the world that's positive even if it is one person at a time, because I feel like I have a really great impact on people's lives and it spreads.

 

And that's amazing to me.

 

That's awesome. So I'm go into two things, first of all. The simplicity of what you just said of helping people one at a time, I think that's something that I know in my career I lost sight of because at times we watch people, or at least I watch people that are getting all these followers on Instagram or Instagram can sometimes be not real, but YouTube or or Facebook or LinkedIn places that we know, OK, this is real. The person has legitimate followers.

 

Maybe they're successful. Maybe they're getting a lot of interviews, whatever might be. And it's not. Jealousy, maybe there's some element of jealousy, but I don't feel for me it's jealousy, it's more of the gosh, why am I not doing better? Why am I not doing my messing up what's off here? And at times when I am more centered, I'll think, well, OK, what have I really fully committed to? I've committed to fully to being a parent and I've never changed gear.

 

So I as an entrepreneur, I've changed gears a couple times. I'm going to do this project, that project being a parent, being married, being the best husband I can. I've still certainly made my share of mistakes, but I've had a consistent commitment to those. And then I look at two my business models that in both of those have been of 20 years and one 30 years. And I'm really good at those. And I mean, I should be.

 

But one of the things that at times has bothered me was this one at a time thing, and yet recently I found a little more solace or a little more security and. Well, yeah, but that's one person, dude, that's that's one person you're helping. And and that is sort of a more simplistic. Or a more patient or a less stressful view of things, and I know we're going to talk how that applies to material things, but how is it helped you to just think more simply this one person at approach time?

 

And how did how did you allow yourself to do that? Or did you struggle with. Well, no, I need to do something that a thousand people are doing or ten thousand people are doing it.

 

So it it's hard. I think the. When you. When you think about one person, think about, OK, so actually coronavirus is a really great example of this. Think about one person gets it and we have all this contact tracing.

 

Right. And who did you come in contact with and and how and how easily it can spread from one person, how something can spread from one person to the next.

 

Right, if you can help one person that spreads.

 

And I think that that's a really important thing to remember because. I'm not just helping mom, let's say I'm helping Amam improve her relationship with her husband or I'm helping a dad improve his relationship with a wife, right? Yeah, yeah.

 

With his with his husband, improve his relationship with a wife.

 

And I'm and then that extends onto their children.

 

Like now the children are going to have a much better life because mom and dad have a better life and that it's just a ripple and it goes on like infinity. Like if these kids can can feel more organized and understand how to organize themselves, it's that's itself up to be it infinitive.

 

And I think that's a really important way to look at it, like, OK, yeah, I'm helping you one at a time.

 

And by the way, I do two courses, so it's not always just one at a time, but like. Even and of course, I try to really get to know my students and and understand and I encourage them to reach out to me because I feel like if I can connect with them on that way, it's going to make it more impactful for them and then it really will spread.

 

And so I think it's really important to remember that even if you are working one on one with somebody. It's more than just the one person who you're affecting, and that's really powerful and strong. I like that word infinitive.

 

I'm going to start using that one sentence. It's hard to say. I've never heard that. I like that word. One of the things I've seen is I've coached kids in youth sports relates this very much. Some of the kids that. I have so much pressure on themselves that it has to be perfect that they can't move, they really they can't try anything. And you see them and I recently one of the kids I coached on my daughter's volleyball team, this girl is pretty good, but she was so in her head.

 

And one of the games she made like two good plays.

 

And I said something to her and she but it wasn't just that I said that she knew that she had done something good and all of a sudden a completely different person and and so much more confidence, so much more fun, because, again, volleyball is supposed to it's a sport.

 

It's a game.

 

It's supposed to be fun and. Also, to your point. And sometimes tell kids and say, look, you know, we're we're doing this basketball coaching or viable coaching or I coached the kids as they go on YouTube, watch videos and check this out.

 

And as apparently I'm now an old person and tell them, look, you know, in my day we didn't have videos we couldn't watch and break down a we had to wait and there was no VCR and we had to watch and watch a basketball game, watch once and try to, in our mind, make sure we focus to see exactly what that guy did on the cross over whatever the move was or the dribble or the dunk and see, OK, how do I repeat that?

 

And you guys can go back and forth in this snap. But I've asked these kids to watch videos and sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. But nothing replaces that person to person connection. I even think of how I started my podcast. I had taken three courses from really good podcast teachers and then finally a friend of mine that had a program.

 

But then she did six weeks of Zoome calls and so me going on to the Zoome calls and just.

 

OK, that's OK. Yeah, that's right. OK. Forty seven years old, I'm a big boy, I can pay my bills, but it was just something of so many these fears of not doing it right. And to your your point, without that help, I mean, for seven years I had courses only. There's nothing wrong, of course, as I of course is to love courses. But I needed that one to one connection. And on some level, whether it's an energy transfer, whether it's a confidence thing, I'm not sure.

 

But I do know that that's how I launched. And without that, I wouldn't have launched. And then you and I wouldn't be talking to the guy and whoever else is being helped out. So, again, that ripple effect is.

 

Yeah, infinitive ending up.

 

And so but more than that, I think like for me personally, like I was trying to think like, OK, I live in Israel, but, you know, we have Zoome. I could talk to anybody at any time. We have Facebook, we have all these different tools. There are so many ways to be one on one with people. And a lot of people are like, I don't want to waste your time, Rebecca. When I say book of consultation and and I want to shake them sometimes and be like, you're not wasting my time, even if I can connect with you for 30 minutes, like I'm willing to give you my most precious resource, something I can never, ever get back.

 

Once I've given it, I'm willing to give it to you for free just to see a for a good fit. But also because even if we're not, maybe I can still give you something. And that's so important to me. And, you know, one of the things when I was actually designing my courses, I'm like, most people never finish the courses that they buy.

 

And I really didn't want that because I don't want to waste anybody's time. I don't want to waste anybody's money.

 

And I actually designed my course as a challenge where they get cash back if they if they complete the challenge each week.

 

And what I found is that it is so motivating, even on a basic level, and they have to check in with me and have that connection with me. And that makes it. It gives them a level of responsibility that they didn't have before, and to me, even though I can service fewer people by doing it that way, it's important because I bring people to the finish line.

 

That's awesome.

 

I've been I have thought about that so many times and I've not done it, and I don't have to ask you maybe some of the details on that, because to your point, there's an assumption in and I remember I told you we're going to go down rabbit holes in the course creator's world that, OK, one percent, two percent, five percent of people to complete a course. And I know I've put some of my questions on you to me, one of the course platforms that put them out for free and.

 

Maybe there's eight thousand people signed up for course, which sounds like a brag, but if you have me, you can have anywhere there's people with two hundred fifty thousand or so. Eight thousand.

 

So I kind of like it's almost to some people might almost be embarrassed thousands or roughly about.

 

In this case. I chose to give away these courses because I just wanted to reach an impact. And the whole concept of democratizing education, helping reach people that maybe couldn't afford it. Nine percent of the people, roughly, have done anything with the course. And then about one percent, I'll get some sort of feedback on or maybe a little less, one percent and maybe about two or three percent complete the course. So there's I mean, there's plenty of numbers there, and that's not enough.

 

People buy exercise bikes all the time. They don't use them.

 

So it's not to say that it's our responsibility, somebody simply because we were we did a horrible job, but something that I had done and I kind of had to do with my small business owner clients was to be able to say, yes, we're going to have these regular some people now call them office hours or whatever it is where we're going to check in. Or sometimes you might have a calendar to say, OK, we're on a five day challenge or a 30 day challenge.

 

And these are this is what we're doing on these days, actually before the second, as opposed to the office hours with office hours, I could I can delay forever with office hours as a student. But if you give me a schedule, I'll jump on schedule.

 

But anyway, in having that ability that people could come in, I would find that the second time around or third time around, people would jump in. That didn't jump in the first time and they had invested their money. And as a creator, I think most people don't see this. If you really are, of course, and you want people to use your stuff, it bothers me that ninety one percent of my people on that Udemy course haven't done it.

 

But then I try to say, OK, well, what can I control? And of course, a certain percentage of free course or a certain percentage, I wouldn't have bought it had I not done it. But it's interesting as we're trying to reach people without some sort of human connection, some sort of touch, there's still something missing. And I still feel that we're and I say that with our kids starting from home, we still need that.

 

And so if you can free up the time to do that and you, like you say, giving your time, talk to this for a second when you're trying, because I know what this is like. But I'd love to hear because you might help me figure out some of this when you're trying to convince somebody. No, seriously, it really is a free session. It really is like I understand the numbers. Like I understand I've got to do ten free sessions, for example, and I'll end up with three clients and I'm OK with the seven or whatever the numbers are.

 

How do you help people get that or how tough is it sometimes help people get that? Yes, I really do believe in giving and I'm not going to high pressure you.

 

And and it's and more than that, it's OK, because sometimes the nicest people won't take the recessions and the cheap buggers will. And you're like, no, I want to get the nice people.

 

How do you how do you maybe address that?

 

I think it's all about the energy. I think when I can when I can focus myself, and I've noticed this even after when I send a recap email, after my consultation, when I'm like.

 

Not desperate, but when I come in, I'm like, yes, I want you as a client, I'm I'm I know I can help you. And where I can in my mind say to myself, like, OK, here are the three things that I can do for this client. And when I can transmit that into, like the email that I'm writing them as the recap of what we spoke to, then I can book them sometimes.

 

It's not a good fit when we're on the call and I'm like, nope, I'm not going to be able to help this person. And I try to send that energy off.

 

I mean, as awful as that sounds, but like I need to sometimes they can see that it's not a good fit also. But I think just in general, and I'm relating to a person, I'm like, I can help you. And it's not coming from a place of ego. It's not coming from a place of like, I'm so great. It's not coming from a place of I need your money. It's just like I know we're a good match and I can help you.

 

And I think that when you can sort of calm the noise in your head and and and bring that forward, it reflects towards other people. It's like what Simon Sinek always says about like finding your wife, like if you know what your wife is in relationship to that person.

 

You're going to you're going to be able to work with them because they're going to see that you have the answer because it's just as if it radiates from you.

 

Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't even know another way to say it, really. It's just like I'm putting out this energy to you. You are receiving it. Maybe it's the right frequency for you. Maybe it's not. I don't mean to get all like WUO, but I, I, I do think that there is a connection in that way. Like sometimes you meet a person even not in business. Right.

 

And, and you meet them and you're like because they're just like slimy and gross. Right. That's what they put out into the world. And sometimes you meet a person and you're like, I need to be with that person.

 

And I just think that, you know, you put out whatever you put out, people feel and understand and perceive. And that is is a really, really. It's hard it's hard to do that, but it's a really great way of like interacting with people because it it says, you know, this is who I am.

 

And I think that people can read through the B.S., you know. Absolutely.

 

And something you said, it just connected for me, too. And I think about it, the people that I really know I can help that I do start kind of geeking out and I won't shut up like, oh, I can help you. And I think it does come across as genuine because it's certainly not smooth.

 

You know, when you kind of go out, it's like it's not like, you know, something that would be off of something like, hey, I can help you. It's it's kind of dorky. It's kind of weird. It's kind of like you're almost it's not desperate, like, oh, no, you got to do this. This is so cool. And and also I just think about not even that, but also when I really do know, for example, the clients I've worked with, that I know the ripple effect it's going to make for their family, their kids, spouse.

 

And I can just see it. I do think there's something that comes across. And I when I'm centered and I need to remind myself to this, I do that thing. I say a prayer to, hey, if it's supposed to be, please help it be. And if it's not. But I also say, please, you know, if it is, help me be the person I need to be and help me realize if it's not so kind of like somewhere between the Serenity Prayer and letting things go, I'd say, look, this is supposed to be I'm willing to serve.

 

Right, but if it's not also true, I think also we never know. Who even who we can really connect with, like if you get on a call with somebody, it's not a waste of time, because even if they're not the right client for you and they might not be, they might have this amazing experience with you because maybe it's just not the right time for them or maybe you really aren't the right culture. You just don't have the tool that they need.

 

But they could know 10 other people who you are the right coach for. And if they have an amazing experience with you, they'll they'll pass you around. Right. Like they'll be like, I met this amazing person. She wasn't exactly right for me because of X, Y, Z, but maybe she's right for you. Check her out.

 

And I think that we can never underestimate the value of that connection with people.

 

And when I was looking all the time. So if you don't have time to do third, that's fine. Just a call. But I feel like the discovery call, no matter what, it's just so important because it sets the tone for and you can learn a lot about your it's not just them interviewing you, it's also you interviewing them.

 

And it sets the tone for your whole relationship. And it's it's a nice way to start out.

 

Absolutely. You know, I think some of this relates to if you come back full circle, there's this connection of I mean, you're coming from a place of time abundance, and yet you're being wise with your time. And one of the things that somehow I think my parents helped me get this, I'm not sure how I got it, but became very clear to me that when you waste money on something, that you waste the time that you took to earn that money.

 

So if you just, you know, you buy stuff that you don't need, you spend five hundred bucks. Well, how long did it take you to make the 500 bucks? Right. And it's not a judgment on the thing, the item, because one man's treasure is another man's trash kind of a thing.

 

So it might be a huge to one person, but this conceptual stuff I'm OK with that would say I'm OK with you judging the stuff I judge stuff stuff should be judged.

 

Well, for example, I don't like to throw around money at happy hour. Now, it's not because I have huge judgments about alcohol. I certainly think alcohol can can have its place where it can be used well and it can really be destructive, but only it's inherent in the thing itself. I just don't I'm cheap, not cheap. I know what it took me to earn that I don't want to drop twenty five bucks on a fufu drink when you know when I could do something else with that.

 

And so I think when we're more clear about what we want to do with our time, I've had the experience of being stressed by want to do my Strategy Session calls from like oh my gosh, I've got so many things to do. And of course, it doesn't come across very powerful. It doesn't certainly doesn't convert.

 

Well, if you really want to go to those metrics and then I've had times where I'll invest two hours in the person while we're going over my notes. OK, I'm sure you've had this where, you know, you're the you're the right client. I like I've I've given myself two hours on your schedule.

 

It says thirty minutes, but I've got at least another thirty minutes that are available that I've not double booked to wear in case you're the right person. And again, it definitely there is there is some sort of a connection, a flow, a vibe, whatever you want to call it, that makes it easier for people to see. But definitely because in that moment I'm clear about what I'm there to do and there to serve, then it works when I'm not clear.

 

Oh, gosh.

 

And and if my cash and I've had this cup have happened a couple of times where cash flow is tighter and I am start like got a little bit of commission breath and again, I don't I don't know, I'd almost want to be a fly on the wall to see what that other person experienced by Zielke. Didn't I hear myself, you know, talking about features and benefits. I sound like a Web page and I'm trying to get know that does this.

 

It does that. It can it can make coffee for you. It's like, no, that's not good.

 

And yet so much of it comes back to when I know and this is something, again, was taught to me was, look, if you look at your history and I can speak for me, I can't speak everybody else. My life has gone pretty smoothly. It's gone smooth than many people on the planet. So this might not work for everybody. Right.

 

But if things have gone pretty well so far and you've been willing to trust and you've tried to serve people, why would things all of a sudden just completely go south?

 

What's and, you know, we have these species entrepreneurs. Oh, my gosh, I'm going to be this responsible employee in a corporation. I'm going to make tons of money and I'm going to go to my own office.

 

And I'm just going to take like, why would that happen? Your whole track record, your elementary school record, for God's sake. Your teacher said you were good in elementary school. You know, like, why would it all change?

 

How does it help you when you do clutter, not just the physical things, but what's that connection between the physical and then perhaps the mind and then allowing you to work less? How do you start tying those things together? Because you and I started it.

 

We would we're geeking out then for those person that needs a little more grounding, how does it turn into the mechanics where you say, yes, having less stuff or having less obligations or how does that turn into becoming more efficient?

 

OK, so I was actually watching this take on video. I'm not embarrassed to say that I love Tic-Tac, OK? And I don't fall down the rabbit hole, but I saw this Tic-Tac about being productive and this guy is sitting there with like seven or eight tips on, like, all these things you should do to be productive, like turn on a timer and and get up fifteen minutes earlier than you already are getting up and do this kind of exercise.

 

And and I and all of a sudden I have the shift in my mind.

 

And I said to myself, what if the goal isn't to be as productive as possible? What if the goal is that we just live our best lives?

 

And and maybe that means that we take some things off of our To-Do list and that makes us more productive.

 

And to me, the way that we can do that is by having less stuff, because when you have less stuff to take care of, there's less to take care of.

 

Like, it sounds so simple, right? But in in Judaism we have this proverb that says more possessions, more worry. And it's true. The more you have, the more you think about your stuff. And the more you worry about it. Oh, did I leave the oven on, oh, are the windows open and it's raining is my whole floor and my whole sofa going to get ruined? Right. Like what's going to happen to my books?

 

Are they going to get moldy because we had a flood? Like all these things, the more you have, the more circumstances in your life start to have again that here's the ripple effect. Right. Like the more you have the just it it extends your worry. And it in a way, it it it lowers your productivity, because all you can do is think about all the things on your list that you have to take care of. But what if you just have less to take care of.

 

Would you reach your goals, would you hit your targets, like would it be easier for you to have more more productivity in your work and increased and improved family time and personal time if you just spend less time thinking about what makes you productive?

 

And like, is it essential that you wake up half an hour earlier than you're already waking up? Isn't there some valuable component to sleep? Also, like I know men physiologically need a little less sleep than women do, but like, you know, we all need to sleep like four hours a night is not enough for most people.

 

Like, everybody is recommending six hours minimum and eight hours is like the appropriate amount. So if if you're telling me I should wake up a half an hour early so I'll be more productive, why my body is going to work better for me if I actually get the sleep that I need and if I have fewer things to take care of, I'll also get a better night's sleep because I'll be worrying less about stuff.

 

And I just I was watching this guy and I'm thinking to myself like. Sad, I just felt sad all of a sudden and a few weeks ago on my podcast, I did a podcast episode about why I don't make my bed.

 

And because that's like the thing everybody says you have to do to be successful, right, get up in the morning and make your bed and I don't like to make my bed.

 

I think it's a waste of five minutes of my time.

 

And I don't like getting into a cold bed. I, I certainly enjoy, you know, on the days that I change the sheets, clean sheets, clean sheet is my favorite day of the week.

 

But like, I just I just like why there's nothing else in my room. Yes, it's true.

 

It looks a little untidy because the bed is not made, but there's no other clutter in my room, so it doesn't really look that bad.

 

And I'm OK with things not being perfect and I feel OK. And sometimes in the middle of the day, especially now with Karen, I just want to get in my bed and then take a take a 10 minute. Now my bed is there and it's ready for me because it's not me and I don't feel bad about getting into it. And I think that that's a huge just thing about productivity that we miss.

 

It's like we also the point of us being here, it's not like it's pinball or we're trying to win the game of life. Do you know what I mean?

 

We're we're here to to make the world a better place than when we first arrived. Like, our ultimate goal should be to leave the world better than we got it. And I don't think that making my bed helps me do that.

 

And I don't know, I just instead of trying to see how much we can squeeze in, let's try to figure out how how much better we can just make the world.

 

And I think that that's something that we we we all miss sometimes.

 

And it's just makes me a little bit sad. It's I think that saying the you're referencing comes from P. Diddy and Biggie Smalls, more money, more problems. So that's where that probably comes from.

 

It's funny. It's right there. It's in rap music, more money, more problems than concept. And I think of. So I'm. A person that keeps cars for a long time, OK, because to me, one of the possibly OK, this is really weird. One of the sexiest things to me in the world is a car without payments.

 

That's like this.

 

And so we have and then right up there where there's a car that I can go to the beach with, get it, Sandy, and not have to clean.

 

And it's not because I don't value the vehicle. So we have a what? It's my son's fourteen. So 14 year old Honda CRV now and I get to take it the beach. And I still I don't throw sand in the car. I still dust off before I get in. My mom would be upset if I didn't.

 

I don't live like a barnyard animal, but I don't have to worry about every detail and yes, every month. So 14 years now. So, you know, the average person's car turnover, I think is like three to five years. So nine extra years. I've had no car payment times, roughly five hundred a month. That's like fifty four thousand bucks.

 

And to me it doesn't you know, I want to get from point A to point B, it doesn't bother me.

 

And to your point, I'm looking more of what am I kind of getting out of things. If you were to tell people, look, the secret to having success is have as many children as you can or as many spouses as you can, more spouses, that'll be better.

 

And, you know, when you're younger, you get older. You have a few kids, you know, two or three or whatever, like we're God.

 

I have a friend that's got seven of them and her sister has six and they're brilliant. They're awesome people even. They're like, okay, No.6 is good, OK? He's kind of got their number. You know, if I were to tell you have five businesses, you say, no, no, there's a number where it's too much. Well, why wouldn't that be the case with things at some point? Like you say, know, I see people when they're out washing their cars and I've probably washed a car, gets about a good once a year wash for me, one of our cars.

 

And then every once in a while we'll take it in somewhere to get detailed because it smells nice or whatever.

 

But here you have to wash it because it's a thing. You have to do it here in Israel. You've got to wash your car out. Oh, yeah. We don't have we don't have a lot of dirt.

 

When I was I guess it depends where you are, so it won't get that bad. I think it's something you have to care for. Oh absolutely. It's nothing to do.

 

It's another responsibility. And so from having in our case with my wife being from Peru, and we would live back and forth from there from Florida. So we would go down there with rent at our place in season up here during the higher price season, and we'd leave it furnished. We'd still have to put some of our stuff in storage and we'd go down approved for three months and that's south of the equator. So there'd be summer down there. Awesome.

 

It really worked out great for quite a while till the kids got in the school. But every time we'd go to the storage unit, it was like, OK, are we really going to store this? And some of the stuff with stuff we would to use against we'd put it in a storage unit and I was like, I'll never use a storage unit. Well, in that case, it paid for the trip down. OK, I'll do this.

 

But every time. There'd be this decision point of, OK, no, this isn't going to stop, this goes right to goodwill because I'm not bringing this back and forth again. And after we made a few trips, sounds kind of similar. What you did with taking your stuff across. I'd love to tell the story about you bringing your stuff across. You know, after a few times we were like, OK, we've got this down and we only have a couple of things we're bringing in now.

 

My business is literally the laptop.

 

A couple of camera items or whatever and a Dropbox account as far as the assets, and that's all I need.

 

I've got a light and I've got a couple other things. And I'm not homeless. I live in a nice place.

 

But all this extra stuff to me, again, just takes up more time. And I want to I want to enjoy it. So share a little, if you don't mind the story, tell me about or whatever you want to share about it of bringing your stuff across and what that was like in the process of letting some of that go.

 

OK, so we we moved from New York to Israel in twenty fourteen. So it was like shortly after I had started declaring and started my business.

 

And, and the thing about it is that everything is very easy to get in America.

 

And even though I had been to Israel before, I wasn't sure, like, well, what's going to be readily available. And I, I, I packed from this place of panic and insecurity thinking that, like, I'm going to need every single thing that I pack because also I was scared.

 

I'm like, I just don't like I don't necessarily know where to go. Like even if you move from Florida to California, let's say you don't still know exactly where the target is. I mean, now you have Amazon, so you can just get whatever you need.

 

Right.

 

But like, you don't always know where everything is going to be and you're worried, like maybe you won't have access to something or you'll be too tired or whatever. So you're so so the and I help a lot of people make this international movement and the overwhelming, you know, underlying thing is, well, I'll have it right away and it'll just be there. And it's always that just in case. And as they were loading up, I was like, wow, this is just so much stuff.

 

They were loading up our 20 foot container.

 

I said to the shipper, like later on that day, I was like, listen, if you want to knock over my container into the sea, I'm totally down with that because I'll just take the insurance money and buy what I need, like now.

 

Right.

 

And he's like, you know what? No one has ever said that to me before. And I realized that there is only about five items that I put in the lift that were totally irreplaceable, like our wedding pictures and our wedding video and some artwork that paintings that I had painted and like maybe one or two like family keepsakes, but pretty much everything in the lift I could replace. And I, I just I said to my husband, I'm like, you know, it is it is cheaper if you already have it and it's better for the environment if you already have it to ship it.

 

That's there's no doubt about that because it's already something that exists. And that's a whole nother calculation and measurement. But I was just like, if if we had to start all over again, I wouldn't feel sad. And that was like a huge shift for me because I realized I don't have this attachment to stuff that most people have because I know that that.

 

We don't wherever we come in with we can't take with us and and so we should live with this carefully curated collection of stuff that we think about, like if something is going to cross the threshold into our home, it has to have a place to live.

 

It has to you have to know how you're going to care for it.

 

And you have to understand that something else probably needs to leave to make space for it, because even for people who have a large home, filling every single square foot of your home with stuff doesn't make your life better.

 

Like if if something doesn't actually have a place to live in your home, it doesn't belong in your home.

 

If you can't allot it a piece of real estate, you shouldn't be buying it and or or bringing it into your home, accepting it, even if it's free.

 

You know, and and this was just like eye opening to me, because what I realized is we we feel more secure with our stuff.

 

We give it a lot of. Space. And we end up working for it. It doesn't work for us and I just felt like. I don't want to have anything that you know. That I have to work so hard for. Let me give you an example here, something that we started doing in our house. Now that everybody's home, we put a timer on our router so that the Internet shuts off at 11 o'clock.

 

And the value of doing this, in my opinion, is, first of all, a lot of people think that having the router on all the time is not healthy and it can interrupt your sleep. But besides, for that is I wanted to show my kids, like, OK, it's devices down at 11 p.m. I don't care.

 

Like you've been on your device all day. We need some time where we're off.

 

Right. And this way, I have automated the process by putting a timer on it. And it's one less thing I need to think about. But it's some way that I can I can keep myself in check and not have to worry about things and.

 

I posted this in a parenting group that I met yesterday that this tip and this one woman says to me, well, I like showing my kids, you know, that if I have a rule, I'm going to be responsible for the role. So I turn it off manually at whatever time.

 

And I'm like, OK, but why do you want to make it hard for yourself? Like, you can automate this process and you don't have to think about it. And you could take one thing off your plate. And by the way, decision fatigue is a real thing. And at the end of the day, you're tired. And, you know, when my kids say like, no, please don't shut it off, please don't shut it off, this takes off like one layer of pressure.

 

One last thing I have to remember, one less thing I have to think about, one less thing I have to do.

 

And it's like definitive. There's no argument.

 

You can't argue with the timer. It just shut off. Right. Like, my kids can't say to my no, please, my mom minutes. Right. Like automating the things in your life so that they work for you. That's the important thing here. You know, you have a precedent. Good for you. You want to teach your kids about rules. Great.

 

This is also a time management hack that you can teach your kids and you can show them how to not suffer from decision fatigue, not worry about remembering things, not not having to fall down the time management rabbit hole.

 

This is a particularly valuable trip tip if you suffer from ADHD or or other poor time management skills.

 

Like, it's just amazing shutting off. So you can have this time, like at eleven o'clock my husband and I talk to each other. Oh, what a great thing. You know, I sit down and I read a book that's amazing system is zation.

 

I tell my wife, I said, that's something. So I have a software company that helps small business owners reward their team members. And one of the most unhealthy things you can do as a business owner is have your team members perform your employees. Whatever we're doing, you staff employees, team members have them perform. And then you be like Santa Claus or like Grandpa, where you're giving out bonuses because you're this benevolent monarch that's decides you're today.

 

I'm giving out bonuses for this because it's almost like this focus on you, because then next time when you don't do like. Well, I don't understand. There's no consistency there. What's the system?

 

And yet if you tell them, look, the system is this. If you do this, you get rewarded this way.

 

Why?

 

Because this system aligns with reality and the finances of the company, whether that's even if you say I'll offer you a 4-Day Work Week opportunity, but here's the production you have to do or whatever, whatever it is, whether it's financial or and once the systems in place, you can say, look, now I'm on your team and I'm going to help you as best as I can to earn that. But I'm not going to change the system because the system is true.

 

It's natural. I'm not going to tell you that you can plant seeds in August and have a harvest in November. It doesn't work that way. But I'm going to help educate you about the system. And to your point, my gosh, if you have kids sometimes. Well, what about five more minutes? The this the that there are certain things in life that are hard, fast, and that's the way they are. And so, yes, absolutely.

 

The decision fatigue, the having something that simple.

 

And to your point, why would I do something that can't be done automatically for me? We do the same thing. I'm thinking of automated now. Now that you've said that because we do, I literally unplug our thing and for the same reasons, we don't want the wi fi signals running around and whatnot. And maybe it's real, maybe it's not. We have a friend that had contracted something from having the cell phone near those ear for long periods of time.

 

So we're pretty sure that there's something to it, even though it's not all the time. But definitely just having a system that allows you to spend less time working. And again, part of it, I think, and you've said it different ways, is it's more of a focus on quality and less of a focus on quantity. And because even when you said you said, you know, curated and you were talking about work, that's the same thing about friends.

 

It takes a while to curate your friends and decide who do you really want to give your time to, not just the people that want some time and attention. And certainly you probably get this, too. I mean, I get a lot of friend requests because I'm now a business than people. You know, they eventually want to sell you something. And your friend is like, OK, well, they're friends with these twenty people that I know and maybe somewhere, you know.

 

But then sometimes within a day, like my pager, boom, out, out. And it's not because I'm better than them. I don't you know, I try to escape if I ever do in Facebook just with friendly stuff and my friends that have two strong political opinions and maybe they'll tell me, I don't know, but I'm good. I just want to see nice, happy stuff. And if I watch my TV, I want to see happy stuff.

 

And if I want news, I'll go to the news station. But definitely being able to use systems because then if the system's wrong, you can always fix the system. So let's try the system for seven days or thirty days and let's see what actually happens. And we can be on systems, but we can be gentle with each other. But when you ask me for exceptions, then I've got a again. Oh God. Do I. Should I.

 

Is this the right time about being a good dad. Let them step. I want to be permissive. I want to be, I won't allow them to live life. But then again, it's it's how many hours of Minecraft or or fortnight can you play.

 

And instead of this whole rigmarole every single night and it gets exhausting, especially with it's with teenagers and just say, no, that's that's when it goes.

 

It goes off. It's done.

 

It's non-negotiable. Right. You just set it and forget it, you know, and it's like this is the way that it is. And you don't there's nothing there's no one to argue with.

 

Like, I think I think what people what this and a bunch of people said, oh, well, you can set your router, certain routers you can set electronically and manage it from your phone.

 

OK, whatever works for you, do it that way. I don't care how you do it.

 

The point is, is like there's this automation that you can do to to make your life better.

 

And in a way, these automation's actually make you more productive, because if it forces you to put a laptop down or phone down or whatever at eleven o'clock, that forces you to rest your mind, forces you to go to sleep, forces you to get a good night's sleep, well, maybe you'll get a good night's sleep or not.

 

You know, that's not on the system. Right. But like it forces you to take these next steps that are healthy for you and allow your body to recharge, be your best self in the morning. And, you know, you don't have to turn the device on.

 

I think ours goes on at like eight o'clock when my husband starts working. And it's hard because we all have different schedules and we're all working from home. And like we have to coordinate in that way. Like for me, I work later in the evening because I'm dealing with the U.S., but he's dealing locally here in Israel and he deals with Europe. And so he has to start a little earlier in the morning. OK, so the span that we have the router on is.

 

Longer than I would prefer to have it on, however. That works for us and we've automated it in this way where it's like we can just take one more thing off our plate and what people don't realize is that like.

 

It doesn't show our kids any more responsibility or any less responsibility by automating something, and what it does is it shows us how where it shows them how to look for the solution all the time and end it.

 

When you have when you raise kids who focus on the solutions and not the problems you get, you get higher functioning kids because they're happier, because their problems arise. And they're they're not like, I got a problem. You know, they're they're they're not facepalm in themselves all the time. It's like, OK, I got a problem, a there's a answer.

 

There's B answer. Maybe there's even see which one am I going to do.

 

And life is so much better when you're focusing on the solution rather than the problem, because then you're not bogged down in this negativity. You're always looking how to push yourself forward, how to be your best self, how to live your best life.

 

Then you will reach the goal of leaving the world a better place than when you got here, because you're not focused on the negative, you're focused on the positive. And that's a huge.

 

A huge plus when you're and I think it circles back nicely to what we were talking about at the beginning, if you're focused on the positive aspect of things, it's much easier to say to a client, I can help you because I'm focused on the solution.

 

I'm a positive person and I'm going to help you problem solve and troubleshoot for you to get you what you need out of life to help you get what you need out of your business.

 

And that's I mean, that's why people hire coaches. Right. Like to help get them to the next level.

 

And if you can show your clients, your kids, your family, your friends how to problem solve everybody's life is going to be so much better.

 

Absolutely. All right, I've got five things that you and I talked about in the preinterview, which I want you to and I'm going to I'm going to if it's cool, I'm going to let you go. And then I might say, OK, I got another one for another one. One of the things you said that I really loved was how letting go of tasks that we are not great at frees us up to let our super powers out and invest our time and energy there.

 

Share a little bit about that, if you don't mind.

 

OK, so let's say you have three tasks on your to do list. And this goes back to what I was talking about with productivity, like the productivity that you have within yourself, like it doesn't have you don't have to be the one doing everything like you. Outsourcing and automating things is OK.

 

As I just said, when you break down the time cost benefit analysis of doing a task, you have to see what is actually worth it for you to do and what is not worth it for you to do.

 

So, for example, if it costs you fifty dollars an hour to hire a cleaner to clean your house and you make one hundred fifty dollars an hour, then it's not worth it for you to clean your house unless you get some sort of physical easement of of from doing that like as if it's like exercise or something for you.

 

But in terms of exercise, no one else can exercise for you.

 

So that's not something you can outsource.

 

So when we're talking about the time benefit analysis, you know, if it's clean my house or exercise, unless you're going to Jazzercise your way through the house, it's not you're not going to get the cardio that or whatever exercise regimen that you do.

 

You're not going to get that from the situation.

 

So you have to really balance and weigh and see what what the cost benefit analysis of you doing each task. Similarly, let's say if you're a coach and you run a website.

 

Is it worth it, is the cost worth it for you to set up the website or hire someone to set up the website because same cost benefit analysis, even if it's equal, even if you make one hundred fifty dollars an hour and they make one hundred fifty dollars an hour, is going to take you three hours to do something that's going to take them 30 minutes probably, and you're going to be frustrated and irritated.

 

And what that's going to do is it's going to set you back for the rest of your day and all of your other tasks that only you can do are going to suffer. So it's really important to figure out where what you have to do yourself and what someone else can do. And as long as they can do it as equally as good as you are, better it's worth outsourcing.

 

Awesome. And, you know, that's something I get stuck with that sometimes because I like doing different things. So sometimes the idea of doing something that I know I could do, but I'm not yet expert at, sometimes it's a curiosity thing and sometimes I'll allow myself that where I'll tell people, look, sometimes I don't need to be. And my and this is where having the less stuff and having the less bills accordingly comes to, OK, actually I do want to go down this rabbit hole because I've always been curious and how to web programmer this or that.

 

Right. Which is very different than. OK, I'm fearful that I can't make enough sales to do this now, again, I'm still all about paying for cash as much as you can and not using credit. So there might be times you say, yeah, Wade, I'm doing my website because right now it's a slow part of my season. But that's very different than Wade. I'm just not doing the things I need to do. And I would go back full circle to say, OK, well, what are you wasting your time on in other areas that's getting you tired, you're not getting your sleep, you're all those other things.

 

Because if this really is again, we said superpower, this is what you love doing and you're great at. Then not only are you better at it and quicker out than other people are, but chances are your income is going to continue growing, your impact's going to continue growing. And to a certain degree, if you really want to go this deep, you're kind of short. You're kind of shorting the world because you're not getting better. I mean, to get somebody to say, well, you don't make it all about money.

 

Well, can make it about impact if you're really that good. I mean, there are certain people. There's musicians. If Eddie Van Halen didn't play guitar as much as you did, gosh, genuinely, my childhood would have been less enjoyable than it was if he said, well, yeah, you know, that's a lot of work or I'm not sure if I can afford that. There's certain people. That's just one example. There's so many people that they've done their thing.

 

And so I think if you don't do it, it's not that if you do it, you'll necessarily reach your genius, but you kind of do. And you said it slightly differently. You're guaranteed, though, if you if you don't get to focus on your genius, you won't get those 10000 hours or however you want to word it. You won't get that time to where you really do excel at something. And certainly for me, I happen.

 

I don't know why I get relaxation from washing dishes. So sometimes if I've been on a computer and you take that proverbial 15 minutes or ten minutes to get up for a computer that works for me.

 

So doing dishes, I don't mind. But if you tell me to clean the house, no, I'm not interested.

 

I'd rather I'd rather outsource that. So. All right. Different topic.

 

OK, when you have less stuff, you need to come up with more creative solutions.

 

You kind of reference this. I've certainly experienced this. How does that work?

 

Not only in personal life, but in business? And how have you found? I found that that can be helpful to perhaps keeping expenses down and make it more likely that you can do your your best work.

 

Well, OK, so this is like it goes back to problem solving.

 

What when you have less stuff, you have to work with what you have. So you have to get more creative about about the solutions that you're using. So I'll take a kitchen example. If you have an amazing kitchen knife, OK, it does the job of all those other gadgets.

 

It does the job of like the popular and the avocado slicer and the garlic press and the banana slicer and the apple core and all those other gadgets that just take up a lot of space.

 

But but our unit maskers, they only do one thing.

 

And and usually task forces are great for some people, like for people who have disabilities, let's say, and using a knife, it's hard for them.

 

But if you don't have that problem and you don't need that solution in that way, thinking about the benefit of the good knife is is better than all these smaller things that take up more time, more space.

 

So the same thing is true in your business if you have one tool that works better than lots of other tools altogether.

 

Or reasonably as good, for example, this is an example that I see a lot, I use KJB for my courses and that is literally this is like an ad that is the exact word that popped in my head.

 

KJB is what popped into my head. Right.

 

But it's such a good job. There are other services that do this too, like I used to job for my courses.

 

And the thing is, is that while it's not necessarily the most perfect, the most elegant solution, it doesn't always do exactly what I want it to do. It takes the place of so many other solutions that it makes my life simplified and easier because I'm going to one address to get what I need.

 

So all the emails, all the courses, all the landing pages, all of the I'm not getting paid by KJB to say this just by the way. But all of those things I should be, but not all of those things are in one place. And what that does for me is I can say to my assistant, let's say, hey, go make a landing page. And it's not like, OK, well, where do you want me to do that?

 

It's obvious it's always going to be in KJB.

 

It's not. Am I making it through the email template service or am I making it through the shopping cart service or am I making it through the funnel service or where is it coming from? Right. It's always in one place.

 

And the beauty of having, like, these All-In-One tools and it's not always like a perfect solution, you know, but for the most part, it's the easiest solution.

 

And it takes away a lot of the like. Oh, I got charged here for this and I got charged there for this. And it makes the accounting more simpler and it makes just service in general more simpler. You only have one address for customer support.

 

If there's a breakdown in the system, it's easier to find and I think people discount that a lot.

 

But in reality, that is. Those are the productivity things that that make us work hard, that make us smarter, not harder.

 

And and I think like when we're talking about productivity in general, we want to work smart because I don't know about you. But lately I've been like playing cards with my kids at night or I sit down and I play. Last week, my husband and I played. I know it sounds like we're kids. We play guess here. We played Othello when we play Canek for.

 

Right. Like like we just sat down and played a game on a weeknight and I sat down and I played Old Maid with my daughter. Even if we're just sitting there watching Tock or watching YouTube or whatever, like that's time that I'm spending with my family and I'm cuddling with my child.

 

And she feels that I love her and my husband feels that I love him.

 

And it's a connection. And like, you know, if it means like that, I.

 

It's it's something I can outsource to my assistant. It's a tool that's making me work easier, like that's the game. That's the goal. Those are the things that make our life better.

 

Why do you want to suffer? So that's just specific job so much.

 

And I'll have to post this in the form because they'll be they've got such a great me. I think they'll appreciate this little clip. But I just think of before I would do it in so many of, you know, the word press. Well, this is free and this. Yeah, but by the time you put in the plug ins and the website of this tool and that tool and some of them, admittedly, like you said, there's a nuance.

 

This might do this one little thing. And if you've got a good company in the case of KJB, we're a great company. We're like, OK, we're going to get to that over time if it's great and if it makes sense. But they also do a good job of saying, hey, by the way, there's other people that are killing it, that aren't using all these doodads that you're looking at. I like I just saw Brendon Burchard did this thing and it was done in a Facebook group with Zoom.

 

And I was like I almost was ashamed of all the different add ons. I'm thinking of buying them like, OK, so Wade. It's not because because he doesn't need that. So do I really need that or can I just focus on the work and focus on doing that. So OK, cool.

 

So third one, can I just say one thing about that.

 

You may even like let the lady from from New York and Israel give you five more seconds here. Yes.

 

I thing that I just want to say about that is like that is a product of marketing and it's and it's it's a layover in all aspects of our life, in business, in our home.

 

We think we need these things, like our life is going to be so great if I just have X, your life is already great. You just have to find the greatness in your life.

 

This thing might make it a little bit better, but you probably already have something in your life that's doing the same thing or something similar.

 

And like reconsider. Where's this I it's this whole thing.

 

Where is this item going to go in my life? Whether it's a physical item or a or a digital item, it doesn't matter where is this going to fit into my life? And I think we really get sucked into the sexy marketing and. Oh, that's that it's it's hard not to tell if it doesn't have a place yet, you pivoted right in the next one. Everything in your house has a place. It has to have a place. You already started going into it.

 

So you thought we were on the same wavelength there.

 

So what is that look like? You said you told me about it makes it easier for your kids to clean up when they know. Yeah. Where stuff goes.

 

And I'm specifically to focus on kids and it works for us adults, too.

 

But kids, because that's almost constantly for all. Just put it where it goes. I don't know. How do you how do you do that?

 

It's really good for husbands. My husband never asked me, where does this go? He just knows now. OK, so here's the thing. If you say to your kids, clean up your room, OK, what does that mean? What is clean mean? Like you haven't shown your kids what clean means. They don't know what it means either.

 

So when you teach your kids and when you do this for yourself, when you show them this is where this lives, this is where that lives, this is where this other thing lives, what you are doing for them is you're giving them a system and you're showing them exactly what to do. So for smaller kids, you have to break it down into smaller tasks. For older kids, you can you don't have to do that quite as much as now.

 

I'm at the point of where I can say to my kids, like, clean your room and they know what that means. But excuse me.

 

But it took me I was like, so excited I was talking to. But they know what that means now. But it took me time to get them to that point where I had to, you know, teach them what a way means. So now they know when they come home, you know, we're not such sticklers about shoes by the front door. I would rather have shoes by the front door than tracking dirt all over the house.

 

But they know, like, I can't leave them right in front of the door. They know that their backpacks go on the hook. They know that their jackets go on the hook. They know that their lunch boxes I mean, now they're not going to school, but they know that their lunch boxes need to come into the kitchen and go into the sink so we can wash them like there are all these steps that now they know.

 

So I can say, like, hey, take care of the things you need to take care of when you first walk in the door. And they know what those steps are now.

 

And when you are specific and this is true with children, this is true with a spouse, this is true with employees, it's true with bosses. When you are specific with people with what exactly you need and the steps that you can take to do this, this is even true for yourself and how to task manage and how to get test done when you lay out exactly what has to happen in the order, it has to happen and for people for yourself, it makes it easier to complete the task.

 

So if you say to yourself. You know, put put the books away. Well, what does a mean I have to pick them up. I have to put them on the bookshelf. This this book goes on that shelf. This book goes on that shelf.

 

And there's an understanding about where things actually live in the house. Where does the silverware go? Where do the glasses go? Where where does the paperwork go? When everybody understands where everything goes, that makes things easier. Similarly, when you're doing a task, when you understand exactly how to break down the task, when you understand that if you have to make a phone call, the first thing to do is get the phone number, then dial it then then press send.

 

When you understand all those steps, it makes it so much easier to get it done.

 

And it's a problem for people who who are procrastinators.

 

They don't understand all the steps or they can't see all the steps.

 

And they're like, it seems so overwhelming. But when you actually break it down into these smaller steps, just like putting things away and giving things a home, when you break things down into smaller steps, it allows you to get the task done more easily because you understand how to get to the end. And that's that's huge.

 

That's huge. Especially with the kids. If they don't see the end or some exact chunk it, you've got to see. OK, let's just do this one part, then come back to me.

 

OK, two more lightning round difference between essentialism and minimalism. They're both things that have been talked about a lot.

 

Essentialism has become I'm not sure if it was coined by the author or if that's been around before then. But what's the difference? What does that mean, the difference with those things for you? I don't know the official definition of either one. I don't know either, but it sounded good when I said that I was really convincing. I just mean, I never heard essentialism before. I forget his name right now, the gentleman, because I've not read the book.

 

I've been wanting to read it, but I've heard minimalism. And I know minimalism seems to imply people are like, you know, as if they're doing without. And then you'd share with me something that you felt essentialism was something perhaps a little bit better than that. Right.

 

So, I mean, for me, I don't consider myself a minimalist. Like, if I would show you my house right now, you would be like, wow, you have stuff. Like people I think are shocked that I have things in my house. We have things. We definitely have things.

 

But what we have is this carefully curated collection of things and everything that we have has a purpose.

 

And I don't like to allow things in my house that don't have a purpose and that aren't essential for us. And when things become an essential, we let them go. Because to me, my feeling about it is that God gave us the blessing of having something, and that's amazing. If I'm not using it, I can pass the blessing on to somebody else.

 

And that to me is like hugely important. Awesome.

 

I hope your husband continues to be useful.

 

And then and this ties right into this, the dopamine hit that we get from buying stuff. I've read different literature or just enough to be dangerous. What have you what have you learned about that?

 

OK, so this goes back to what I was talking about before and thinking that we need to buy things because we need them, because the marketing is so good. Right. Like, I love good marketing. I love beautiful packaging. My background in design. I am a total sucker for good packaging and I like desperately think I need everything.

 

And I got to pull myself back and be like, whoa, wait a minute, do I already have something that I that I'm using like this in the same way?

 

Like for me, I mean, people are paying a lot of money to get you to buy, are paid to get you to buy things. Think about a product in the supermarket.

 

Let's say grocery producers pay a lot of money for shelf placement, you know, to get placed at eye level, either eye-level for adults, are eye-level for kids, whatever it may be, they're paying for that. And you got to remember that nothing that's happening in a consumer situation is happening by accident. Everything is very, very purposely done. And and Facebook ads are that way.

 

And maybe commercials on TV last, but Google ads certainly there. You know, I don't want to sound like it's a conspiracy or anything, but definitely a lot of times you're talking about something in that Facebook ad comes up on your Facebook feed, right? Like, Oh, I need something and oh, there it is the next day. Right. Like, you know. And so so I definitely think there is targeting going on, is targeting happening.

 

And sometimes it's really hard to resist. And I'm not I'm not saying I've never made a stupid purchase. I'm not saying that I've purchased you know, I always purchase virtually virtually virtuously. But what I am saying is that you can put you can you can pull the reins back a little.

 

You can hold off for twenty four hours. You can put it in your cart and forget about it for and see if you still want it.

 

When in the olden days when we used to go to the clothing store, I used to put things on hold like you used to physically put it on hold and then go back to it if you wanted it, or if they have a lot of it, you could go back tomorrow and I feel like. One of the biggest things that you could do is if it wasn't on sale, would you actually buy it? Like, would you pay full price for this item?

 

Forget whether you can afford it or not, but would you actually be willing to pay full price for it if, you know, if you're waiting for a sale for whatever reason? Fine. But like, if you're really willing to pay full price for this item, then, OK, that could be the litmus test for you.

 

But on top of that, it has to be if I bring this into my home, where am I going to put it?

 

Yeah, and something you just said there, I think about when I'm intentional, I use Black Friday. When I'm not intentional, Black Friday uses me because I have like I usually buy my laptops. I've done this for years. Whenever I buy a new laptop, it's every three to five years, depending on how well things go. But it's almost either Black Friday or Cyber Monday. I'll know what I'm looking for. I'm just literally OK, this is the best time for me to get what I was going to get anyway.

 

So it's a very intentional purpose, our purchase. That's very different than when I see something like you said, that's I like that criteria, what I I've bought it if it were, you know, if it weren't on sale. Yeah.

 

Awesome. All right. So, wow.

 

Gosh, we got to ones. We've got this so many things. I had a list of things I didn't want to get them all, so. First of all, thank you for what you've shared. I mean, I've really enjoyed where we've gone with this and what we've done to this.

 

So one of the things that I saw that I really liked and I'm going to encourage people to take a look at is your five day de cluttering challenge.

 

And I'll ask you to share a little bit about that and where they can do that. I just can tell people I've been doing this since I got years ago, wrote a book called Put Your Money Where Your Soul Is and had been following Henry David Thoreau and all these different things. What you want to call it, essentialism, minimalism, whatever it is, there's a way of approaching life that is simpler. And from hearing you talk, I can tell that's very much a part of what you're doing.

 

So you have my home. You've got my official stamp of approval of your squat.

 

But but I just I really like, wow, you really, really know this and get this. But where can people find out more about what you do and what is it that you do specifically? How do you help people and where can they connect with you? And we'll of course, put the links in the show notes, the podcast notes, whatever.

 

OK, so you can go to my website, Balagan Be Gone Dotcom, and you can click on the lightbox that will pop up and download the five day decoder ring challenge or join the mailing list and you'll get the five day cluttering challenge.

 

If you want to follow me on Instagram at Balagan Be Gone. You can during the nights of Hanukkah, which are the week of December 6th and 7th, that whole week, I'm going to be giving away eight nights of my masterclass. Conquer your clutter. And if you don't win, you can join for the first week after that at a discounted price. The class starts in the New Year on January 3rd. And the great thing about this class is if you get the higher level, it's a challenge.

 

So actually, for every challenge that you succeed at, you actually get money back.

 

And so I try to be as motivating to my to my students as possible because I really, really want them to succeed.

 

And what I've done is I have made this program where you it's ten weeks long and you get the the course every week. And then every week we have a live Q&A and there are extra bonuses. You can certainly buy extra sessions with me directly if you want extra one on one face time with me. But what I have found is that this model is so successful with people because they're like, yes, I want my money back.

 

Right. And I love that and I want to give you your money back.

 

So so it's like super motivating to to finish the course.

 

And people really make a huge difference in their lives when they complete the course and and live with less. And so. Yeah.

 

So you can find me there and of course anybody can feel free to reach out and email me is not a waste of my time. Rebecca at Balagan Be Gone.

 

 

And I will of course give you all the information Wade and you can put in Insurance. And thank you so much, I'm so grateful to have you come on, I hope you all enjoy this and got a lot of us. If you thought some of this was maybe a lot, listen to it again. Again, so much what she's talked about, I've either done or tried to watch people do. You've given me definitely a couple of their ideas and my improvements will be infinitive.

 

So anyway, thanks again so much for coming out. And as always, look forward to helping you in the audience, help more people make more money and less time doing the best so you can better enjoy your family, your friends and your life. Thanks for listening.